starless (starless) wrote,

  • Take truck to dealership

    • Replace transmission?

    • Get loaner to drive!

  • Sort out my "medical withdrawal" or a way to not fail Macroeconomics.

  • Go home and get back in bed because I still feel like death from treatment Wednesday

  • Maybe watch Mad Max trilogy because... Mad Max.

I'm tired. And mostly I'm just tired of people. They are the most frustrating part of all of this. And it probably isn't anything that they're doing, it's probably all me. If someone offers help, I refuse because I think they couldn't possibly mean it. If they leave me alone or treat me normally, I feel slighted because "how can they not take my disease into consideration??" They can't win.

And smokers especially stoke my ire lately. How can they think that it doesn't matter? That a little poisoning of the people around them is ok? Smokers are aggressive because they're either always on or withdrawing from stimulants. They stink. Their speed addiction effects the health of everyone in their lives, but they don't care because their addiction is more important.

I used to be one.

Oh, and guess what! Over 50% of those with bladder cancer are/were smokers! Smokers... STOP IT.

Enough ranting. I should get myself together to go hang out at a dealership for hours.

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